Guess whaaat???
Well, I figure it's about time. :)
It's pretty pointless to blog every day when your every day is exactly the same as the other day. However, there is something quite significant going on (in a life way, and a heart way) for me right now. And I want to share.
As most of you know, I went to India for 5 weeks this last spring. It was a missions trip with a mission called Christar and I went with a team from my school. The experience was incredible beyond words. I learned so much, and my eyes were opened in so many ways. I did things I thought I could never do, saw things I thought I would never see, and trusted God in a way that I had never trusted him before. I know it's so cliche, but I truly fell in love with the country. It's so hard to explain because the country itself is not beautiful in a typical way. It's stinkin' hot, very smelly, and just in general, a very real assult to the senses. And yet, long after the trip was over, India stayed on my heart and mind. I can honestly say that since I returned home in June, not a day has gone by that I have not thought about India.
Something that we talked about as a team during debreifing was searching out what this experience was going to mean in our lives. What did God want to do in our lives with this opportunity? Because honestly, it would be incredibly selfish and just plain old wrong to see the trip as being a nice little "experience" and leave it at that. It took me a long time to even begin to WANT to search this out in my own life. I knew that if I began to explore the reasons why this country had become so much a part of me, I was going to have to take responsibility for it. I wouldn't be able to hide behind "Yes, I had a great time. It was a great experience" anymore. But over time, and because of God's amazing and never ending patience with me, I began to see.
I began to see that God took me to India for a reason and a specific purpose. I began to see that that reason and purpose was not completely fulfilled the day that I left India. I began to see that I CAN trust God with my future. (A lesson I must learn again and again.) And eventually I came to the conclusion that no matter what I do with my life, I MUST use it to serve Him. In that quiet and gentle way that my savior has, he opened my eyes to the fact that my life is uselsess if it is not spent by serving him. But it's not like he's forcing me into a lifetime of servitude. I WANT to. I have such a desire to use my life for his glory.
Trust me, this scares the bujeebers out of me. I am not a super-Christian. Honestly, I SUCK at being a Christian most of the time. And so often lately I have felt like I am standing at the edge of a cliff, with my toes peeking over the side. But the thing that makes it SO exciting, is that I know when I jump, I'll fall right into the arms of Jesus. Okay I KNOW that sounds incredibly corney. But it's TRUE!! And it's the only way I can describe this feeling. He KNOWS what my future holds. He KNOWS and understands my heart for India and my yearning to serve him in whatever I do. He holds all my dreams and hopes in the palm of his hand and he isn't going to squish them like some mean old grinch. He loves me!!! I'm his little girl and he's going to take care of me!!
Whew... okay I know I can get a little passionate about this. Sorry... *sheepish grin*
Okay, all that to say, within the last week I feel like I've taken a step towards following God's plan for me. And if you'll allow me, I'd like to take that cliff analogy I used earlier and switch it up a bit. Something I'm learning lately is that sometimes life is more of a series of baby steps, rather than plunges. Oh there definitley is the occasional plunge. But I think for the most part, God guides us slowly and it's more of a winding path. (Looking back my path has made a lot of detours...Praise the Lord that he never gave up on me and ever will!!!) Right now I'm working at Tim Hortons and living at home. At times I feel very uselss, and very stuck. But I'm learning to see this time as a valuble part of the path. A part that God will use.
OKAY... geez it is taking me a long time to say what I want to say. Thanks for sticking with me this long. :)
While I was at PRBI this September for our Team India reunion, I learned about this program that Christar does called Darshun. It is a very intense and focused training program for those interested in ministering to Hindus. It's a 5 week program with one week in Ontario for training and orientation, two weeks in India for more focused learning (about the culture and religion), and then two weeks in England. The two weeks in England serve as a field to put into practice what we have learned. There are tons of English speaking Indian immagrants who live in India so we can use our tools without the language barrier.
After much thought, prayer and discussion with my parents and other trusted people in my life, I have decided to do this! I'm going back to India!!! I seriously could not be more excited. Although I don't think it's really sunk in yet.
I'm not sure exactly what this means for my life yet, but I do know that God has put the people of India on my heart and this is the next step He wants me to take.
I'll be getting out a prayer letter as soon as possible and I'll make sure to keep everyone posted on what's going on in my life. Thanks for reading this! I know it's stinkin' long! :)
It's pretty pointless to blog every day when your every day is exactly the same as the other day. However, there is something quite significant going on (in a life way, and a heart way) for me right now. And I want to share.
As most of you know, I went to India for 5 weeks this last spring. It was a missions trip with a mission called Christar and I went with a team from my school. The experience was incredible beyond words. I learned so much, and my eyes were opened in so many ways. I did things I thought I could never do, saw things I thought I would never see, and trusted God in a way that I had never trusted him before. I know it's so cliche, but I truly fell in love with the country. It's so hard to explain because the country itself is not beautiful in a typical way. It's stinkin' hot, very smelly, and just in general, a very real assult to the senses. And yet, long after the trip was over, India stayed on my heart and mind. I can honestly say that since I returned home in June, not a day has gone by that I have not thought about India.
Something that we talked about as a team during debreifing was searching out what this experience was going to mean in our lives. What did God want to do in our lives with this opportunity? Because honestly, it would be incredibly selfish and just plain old wrong to see the trip as being a nice little "experience" and leave it at that. It took me a long time to even begin to WANT to search this out in my own life. I knew that if I began to explore the reasons why this country had become so much a part of me, I was going to have to take responsibility for it. I wouldn't be able to hide behind "Yes, I had a great time. It was a great experience" anymore. But over time, and because of God's amazing and never ending patience with me, I began to see.
I began to see that God took me to India for a reason and a specific purpose. I began to see that that reason and purpose was not completely fulfilled the day that I left India. I began to see that I CAN trust God with my future. (A lesson I must learn again and again.) And eventually I came to the conclusion that no matter what I do with my life, I MUST use it to serve Him. In that quiet and gentle way that my savior has, he opened my eyes to the fact that my life is uselsess if it is not spent by serving him. But it's not like he's forcing me into a lifetime of servitude. I WANT to. I have such a desire to use my life for his glory.
Trust me, this scares the bujeebers out of me. I am not a super-Christian. Honestly, I SUCK at being a Christian most of the time. And so often lately I have felt like I am standing at the edge of a cliff, with my toes peeking over the side. But the thing that makes it SO exciting, is that I know when I jump, I'll fall right into the arms of Jesus. Okay I KNOW that sounds incredibly corney. But it's TRUE!! And it's the only way I can describe this feeling. He KNOWS what my future holds. He KNOWS and understands my heart for India and my yearning to serve him in whatever I do. He holds all my dreams and hopes in the palm of his hand and he isn't going to squish them like some mean old grinch. He loves me!!! I'm his little girl and he's going to take care of me!!
Whew... okay I know I can get a little passionate about this. Sorry... *sheepish grin*
Okay, all that to say, within the last week I feel like I've taken a step towards following God's plan for me. And if you'll allow me, I'd like to take that cliff analogy I used earlier and switch it up a bit. Something I'm learning lately is that sometimes life is more of a series of baby steps, rather than plunges. Oh there definitley is the occasional plunge. But I think for the most part, God guides us slowly and it's more of a winding path. (Looking back my path has made a lot of detours...Praise the Lord that he never gave up on me and ever will!!!) Right now I'm working at Tim Hortons and living at home. At times I feel very uselss, and very stuck. But I'm learning to see this time as a valuble part of the path. A part that God will use.
OKAY... geez it is taking me a long time to say what I want to say. Thanks for sticking with me this long. :)
While I was at PRBI this September for our Team India reunion, I learned about this program that Christar does called Darshun. It is a very intense and focused training program for those interested in ministering to Hindus. It's a 5 week program with one week in Ontario for training and orientation, two weeks in India for more focused learning (about the culture and religion), and then two weeks in England. The two weeks in England serve as a field to put into practice what we have learned. There are tons of English speaking Indian immagrants who live in India so we can use our tools without the language barrier.
After much thought, prayer and discussion with my parents and other trusted people in my life, I have decided to do this! I'm going back to India!!! I seriously could not be more excited. Although I don't think it's really sunk in yet.
I'm not sure exactly what this means for my life yet, but I do know that God has put the people of India on my heart and this is the next step He wants me to take.
I'll be getting out a prayer letter as soon as possible and I'll make sure to keep everyone posted on what's going on in my life. Thanks for reading this! I know it's stinkin' long! :)
1 Comments:
Hey Vanessa,
That's very cool. It's cool to see people living out their lives for Christ in real ways that involve taking risks and just shutting up and jumping. It's encouraging that you will be following your heart to serve God in India.
I was very confused because I thought that you had gone back to PRBI for another year of school but it all makes more sense that you were up there for a reunion for India so that's very cool.
Enjoy your God-given adventures!
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